Traditional Black Womanhood

Traditional Black womanhood is having a hard time in 2019.  It is having a hard time being heard, respected and taken seriously by anyone, even or I should say especially by other Black women.  It seems that anytime a Black woman speaks from a traditional point of view (I’m not talking politics) she is often mocked and put down.

Fantasia Barino, Gabrielle Douglas and Nicki Minaj have all made traditional remarks about womanhood over the last few years and have all faced criticism and mockery for it.  There is irony in all of the statements made by these well known women however it doesn’t necessarily make the viewpoints invalid and I don’t understand the so called backlash for their remarks.

Fantasia Barino of American Idol fame set off a poop storm this week when she said she follows her husband’s lead.  Her husband chimed into the on line discussion and he made a lot of good points about male leadership in a family.  They made sense and I think this couple is correct in their point of view.

But Fantasia’s public statement upset feminists for some reason that I don’t understand.  Some critics said that Fantasia was being arrogant and looking down on unmarried women.  But we’ve known Fantasia a long time now and she’s never been condescending or pretentious so I don’t think that judgement is fair.

Some of the disagreement stems from the fact that Fantasia makes way more money than her husband.  The pundits have a point there.  Oh and he’s a felon that she married after three weeks.  Fantasia’s marriage definitely raises some eyebrows but I still agree with her opinions about heterosexual, traditional marriages.  Even if I didn’t agree with Fantasia and her husband I would just excuse it as a difference of opinion.  But the feminists are angry this week at the thought of submitting to a man that they chose to marry.  I don’t get it.

Olympic gold medalist Gabrielle Douglass made a tweet a few years back saying that women should dress modestly.  Twitter erupted into a fury.  Gabrielle was maligned for this statement.  The feminists mocked her religious background and of course they brought up sexual assault.  The Twitter mob insulted Gabrielle’s intelligence and implied that she was brainwashed and didn’t think for herself.

I’m trying to understand what’s wrong with valuing modesty.  Do we all need to seek validation by posing mostly naked on social media.  Some women think that is empowering.  I don’t but to each their own.  No one is hurt by Gabrielle Douglas wanting to wear clothes.  I understand that Gabby Douglas came to fame in a leotard in front of a global audience so it is a bit of a hoot hearing her promote modest dress.  But again, I think that she is absolutely correct.

Nicki Minaj recently decided to retire and focus on her upcoming marriage and starting a family.  I think it’s lovely.  That move made Nicki a feminist heroine to me.  I believe that a woman can have it all in her life but she probably can’t do it all at the same time the way men can.

Nicki has had a great deal of success and has made a lot of money and now she wants to place her focus on being a wife and mother.  This is another questionable relationship.  Nicki too is marrying a felon that she out earns by a mile, maybe two or three.  He wouldn’t be my choice for a mate but nonetheless he’s her man and I think it’s nice that she is making family life her priority.  I hope she gets everything she wants.

There was a lot of social media buzz surrounding Nicki’s comments.  Most of the commentary was negative but there were some congratulatory wishes.  I don’t know why anyone would have any negative feedback about a wealthy woman in her thirties pausing her career to begin a family life.  I think it would be foolish to try and balance both.

The world has a one dimensional view of Black womanhood and it is mostly negative.  The world is very comfortable with Black women spreading promiscuous and new age feminist messages but not family oriented values.  I’m not sure why that is.  I tend to believe that things we see in the media groom those that consume certain images and messages.  Certain segments of the population are being groomed for failure from the start.

Black women are seen as traditional and wholesome once they are past their prime.  I think it’s great to see young, attractive Black women expressing wholesome values while they are young.  It’s a shame that their biggest detractors seem to come from within the Black community.

 

Why I Love Gabby Douglas

Simone Biles is the gymnastics star of the 2016 Olympics.  She performed beautifully and is as cute as she can be.  The story of her road to Rio is an inspiring American dream that will bring tears to your eyes.  Simone deserves to be the belle of the ball.  But I absolutely love Gabby Douglas.  She is a mature champion that has represented our country well.

During the Olympic trials I could tell that Gabrielle had changed since the London Olympics.  She has matured and become a young woman as opposed to the bubbly, eager girl we met in 2012.  Gabby Douglas is reserved, poised and focused.  She carries herself like a sophisticated lady that is in Brazil to win medals, not entertain or be anyone’s pet.

Gabby Douglas is a refreshing change from many of the young women that are paraded in front of us and lauded as celebrities.  She is not a young woman that is on TV or in magazines for the purpose of arouse men.  She is not there to be funny or cute.  She is there to win.

There is something a little steely about Gabrielle Douglas this go round.  But I love it.  I see the same character in Russia’s Aliya Mustafina.  Aliya competed in the London Olympics and has probably completed her gymnastics career.  She and Gabby are not little little girls any more.  They are veteran champions with youthful, beautiful stalwart exteriors.  God bless them.

It seems that Gabby Douglas has been criticized during the Rio Olympics.  I don’t take Twitter jabs very seriously because I know that people will complain and find fault in anything.  The criticism of Gabby Douglas is rooted in sexism and racism.  American culture wants Black women to be clowns on some level.  Attractive young women are asked to be bimbos.  Black Americans prefer to put light skinned women with European features on a pedestal.  Gabby Douglas is none of that but still successful and there are some that hate it.

All I can say is watch out Simone Biles.  Today you are America’s sweetheart.  Enjoy it because you deserve it all the spoils of victory.  But I hope the fickle American public will be kind to you when you when you compete in Tokyo in 2020.