WORST DATE EVER!

I’ve never been all that lucky in love but I’ve never had a really bad date either.  That is until yesterday.  I had the worst date ever.  I met a 54 year old man on OK Cupid named Ron.  We met for lunch yesterday.  This is our story.

I don’t take on line dating seriously but I decided to give it a try (again).  I chat with people for fun but it would be wonderful to meet the love of my life.  So I had been talking to Ron.  The interaction was nothing special.  I spoke with him on the phone a few times.  Again sparks didn’t fly.  He suggested that we meet and against my better judgment I agreed to meet him.

I would prefer to not go out with someone until we developed some familiarity and had a few enjoyable conversations with each other.  I think that if two people even decide to go on a date it should be kind of special.  Ron is one of these people that like to treat dating as if it is a job interview.  He asked a lot of questions about my previous relationships with men and my current dating habits that really kind of turned me off.  He also said that he needed to meet someone in person to see if he really liked them or not.  Once again I was a bit put off by this.  But I decided to set aside some time to see him yesterday.

I was going to get in touch with him and tell him that I wasn’t interested in meeting.  But I was really hungry after church yesterday and I figured since I needed to get something to eat I would invite him to meet me at a sandwich shop.  He suggested we go to a winery in the center of town and I agreed to that.

I wasn’t familiar with the place and he told me that it was next to Barnes & Noble at the corner of Broadway and 47th Street in Kansas City.  I knew where the Barnes & Noble was so I parked near there and walked towards the corner.  I didn’t see any restaurant on any corner.  I called him and asked him for further directions.  He said it’s near McCormick & Schmick which was in the other direction.  So I walked back up the block toward McCormick & Schmick and saw no other restaurants other than a coffee shop.  I got the name of the place when I spoke to him and I Googled it and found out the entrance was on Broadway.  I never would have found the place if it wasn’t for Google Maps.  I had been walking back and forth on 47th Street in a black dress with a scarf on in about 85 degree heat.

He calls me again and ask me where I am.  I told him I was on my way.  He repeats it’s on the corner of 47th and Broadway.  The daft man never seemed to understand that the landmarks he gave me were all on 47th Street and the entrance was around the corner on Broadway.  Anyway, I find my way in and sit at the table and he says “I don’t understand why you had a hard time finding it”.  I tried to explain that I was on the wrong street from the entrance.  He continues to be defensive about his directions with me.  I just say I’m sorry for being late to end it.

So we start talking and he starts with a bunch of questions.  When was your last relationship?  How long did they last?  Why did they end?  Were you in love with them?  What would your exes say about you?  Do you ever approach men that you like?  Seriously, it was just like a job interview.  Towards the end he even asked if I had any questions for him.  I told him no and he seemed frustrated or perhaps disappointed.

Ron says he likes to get to the point because he doesn’t want to waste time.  I think I’m a pretty pleasant person to be around so I don’t think that spending time with me is ever a waste.  Once again, I was disenchanted with Mr. Ron.

He mentioned that he talked to a woman on Tinder once and at one point she mentioned that she was celibate.  He said that he was no longer interested in her and he was mad that she wasted his time.  He thought that she should have put that at the top of her profile because he invested a lot of time messaging her on Tinder.  Ron thinks that this woman owes men that information.  What a shame.At the beginning stages of what could be a relationship I treat it as an observation stage.  I just want to see how a person acts and what actions they take.  I want to see if we can have a decent enjoyable conversation together.  Anyone one can give a nonsense answer to a question.  And Ron has been in sales for ten years so I’m sure he’s good at telling people what they want to hear.

In fact I caught Ron in a lie.  In one of our phone conversations I asked him if he grew up in Kansas City.  He said yes.  I asked him if his family was here.  He said yes, all of them were here.  During dinner he told me that his daughter lived in Texas with her three girls.  Why one Earth would you lie about something like that?  The man is lying about things that make no difference what so ever.

Ron was also just plain rude.  Not only did he scold me for not being able to follow his bad directions and I caught him in a lie but he had the nerve to ask me how much I weighed.  When I told him he challenged me and said that he didn’t believe that.  This man is fifty four years old and this is the level of social grace that he has.  Good grief.

He also decided to give me dating advice.  He told me that I should put more than one picture up on my dating profile and one should be a full body shot because men are visual.  I told him to look at my Instagram page because I have over 500 pictures on there.  He mentioned that I wore hats in a few pictures and he was wondering if I had hair.  What a charming lunch date.  He was on the same website and he’s eleven years older than me.  Perhaps he shouldn’t be giving out dating advice.

The waitress dropped the check while I was finishing desert.  The key lime pie was excellent and it was worth me going out that afternoon.  It sat there until I finished desert and was ready to leave.  I put my debit card in the book to take care of the bill and Ron pulls out his wallet.  He wanted me to give him a ten back for his twenty.  Fortunately, I had a ten dollar bill so he took care of his portion of lunch.  What a gentleman!

So we leave the restaurant and we say good bye with an awkward hand shake in front of the entrance on BROADWAY.  It was strange because he seemed to kind of like me.  He never seemed that way during dinner.  So I walk away and turn the corner onto 47th Street and head back to my car that’s about two blocks away next to Barnes & Noble.

He texted me later that night and said it was nice to meet me with a blushing happy face emoji.  I don’t really know what that means.  I said “Thanks, you too” to be polite.  Later on I decided to delete all of his texts, his contact number, block his number from my phone and unmatch with him on OK Cupid.  He’s a man that values his time so I won’t even waste his time by communicating with him again.

In a way I’m glad I met Ron yesterday because I can now cross him out of my life with no doubts.  But my belief was reinforced that my first instincts about people are usually correct.  I tried a new restaurant which was a nice place with fantastic key lime pie.  (I gave them a good review on Google).

Kansas City Fashion Week

Kansas City Fashion Week was October 8-14.  The event took place downtown Kansas City, MO at Union Station.  I went to the Thursday night show after work and I was able to buy a ticket at the door.  I enjoyed the show and I was impressed with the production.  It was a fun, glamorous event and I am likely to attend next year.

The work of the featured designers was exciting and contemporary.  Some of them are local, regional and even nationally known designers.  I was glad to see several African American fashion designers in the line up.  I’ve often wondered why there hasn’t been a Black designer to hit it big in the fashion industry.  African Americans influence fashion globally but there is no Black designer that’s on par with Tom Ford or Calvin Klein.  It would be great to see someone from the Midwest blaze that trail.

My favorite designers were Miranda Hanson and Travis Cal.  Miranda Hanson is a seventeen year old dress maker.  Her designs are feminine and ethereal.  She used soft pastel colors and fabrics that look like satin.  I can see them being worn for formals and in weddings.  Her models wore baby’s breath in their hair and they all kind of looked like little pixies.  Her show was beautiful and her story is inspiring.

I loved Travis Cal’s show.  Travis Cal went to high school in Kansas City and he clearly had a great deal of support from the crowd.  His collection is urban, hip, sexy and trendy.  He used several African American models and his collection was influenced by African art.  He used a bold color palate and and a lot of metallic elements. I loved it!

If you like to support the arts and creativity in Kansas City you should come out for Kansas City Fashion Week next winter for Spring 2018.  Tickets ranged from around $30-$90.  It’s a great event.

Travis Kelce’s 87 and Running Walk the Walk

Capture+_2017-06-14-13-43-01-1-1Last Thursday I attended Walk the Walk in downtown Kansas City, MO.  Walk the Walk is a fashion show that is sponsored by Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce that benefits a children’s charity called Operation Breakthrough.  I learned about the event on Travis’ Facebook page and decided to go.  I like to go out to various events in the city and I thought it would be fun to be around and maybe meet Travis Kelce.

I have had a crush on Travis for about two years now.  I think it all started when I saw him Hit the Quan in the end zone that one Sunday a few season’s back.  So I decided to test God’s will and see if it is in His plan for us to be together.  I figured I had to put myself in position to be hit on by Mr. Kelce.  Well evidently Travis isn’t my happily ever after because his girlfriend was there.

After buying my ticket for the event I found out that Travis had one.  I felt a little cheated and I thought about not even taking the time to go.  But I decided to go and support the children.  Why not?  It’s something out of the ordinary to do and it was a charity to benefit underprivileged children after all and not spinsters looking to date much younger professional athletes.

If you’re thinking about going next year and you would like to meet Travis you should.  He makes himself accessible and he works the room.  He’s not shy at all and is quite the talker.  After the fashion show he said that he would stay around to meet everyone and take pictures.

I didn’t take advantage of this opportunity.  He’s in a relationship now and I didn’t want to embarrass myself by fan girling out too bad.  I’m unsure of how I would have reacted if I made direct eye contact with him.  If he was unattended I may have had something to say but with his date in the room I had nothing.

But anyway, it was a lovely event that supported a great cause.  Drinks and finger foods were served and the fashions were nice.  I would actually considering going again next year regardless of Travis or my relationship status.

My Analysis of “Catching Kelce””

I know I’m way late. But I was a bit busy. In fact I didn’t even see the finale of “Catching Kelce” at the time it aired a few weeks ago. I had to have my mom DVR it for me and I watched it several days later. For those of you that don’t know, “Catching Kelce” was a dating show patterned after the “Bachelor” where Kansas City Chiefs tight end looked for love from a group of fifty starry eyed NFL wife hopefuls. I thought about trying out for the show myself but I am far too old. Yes, I looked into it.

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travis-and-dog

I’ll skip right to the end. He picked a young woman from Kentucky named Maya Benberry. I was glad that he picked Maya because she is Black or at least mixed or something. I always cheer on Black people regardless of the contest. It could be the Olympics, a pageant, pro sports, political election or game shows. Before you label me a racist keep in mind that Black women are the least likely demographic to get married. And if you’ve ever watched “The Bachelor” you know that the Black women rarely even make the qualifying round. I’m a Black woman so I support Black people especially women. And regardless of race, if I was a betting woman I would always put my money on the long shot. Black girls are the long shot in everything.

maya

So I’m really glad to see a handsome prosperous bachelor choosing a Black woman but I kind of wish he hadn’t picked that one. Maya was actually one of my least favorite people on the show and even from the field of Black women on the show I think he could have chosen better. I hope Travis is happy because I love him but I just don’t see it. But hind sight is 20/20 and I think she was his favorite from the start. The heart wants what the heart wants I suppose.

My favorite contestant on “Catching Kelce” was Cee Cee from Michigan. I thought she was super cute with a bubbly personality. She was light hearted, funny and didn’t seem to take the show too seriously. But I will say that the idea of Cee Cee and Travis operating as a couple gave me pause. If you are familiar with Travis you know that a pairing between him and a somewhat vapid party girl that enjoys drinking whose friends refer to her as “the Reckless One” may not be the best help mate from an athlete that was once described as having character flaws. Nonetheless Cee Cee was the greatest and I wish her well in life.

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I was also fond of Avery. I saw a lot of myself in her. Avery has a reserved personality and was a bit mysterious. I think that Avery is an old fashioned woman that expects a man to earn her love, attention and affection even if you are an NFL star. She didn’t compete heavily with the other women for Travis nor did she dangle her body in front of him like Christmas ornament. I can tell that Avery wants to take her time in order to get to know a man.

avery

People these days like instant validation. They don’t want to take the time to search a person’s mind and heart. The focus is usually sexual gratification, personal validation or ownership. That’s why romance is rare in these modern times. I don’t believe you can ever really fall in love with a person without learning their mind, heart and soul. Intimacy takes time but most don’t want to invest the time. Even Travis said that Avery was a lot of work because of her somewhat aloof personality. But maybe he was right. She might just not been that into him.

The two girls left standing at the finale in Kansas City were Maya and Veronica. They were two of the most competitive and assertive women on the show. They also both have huge boobs. The lovely blonde Veronica from New Jersey was the runner up. I liked Veronica. She seemed like fun and I think she would have been a good pick for Travis. I’m not concerned for her in the least. I’ll bet she ends up marrying one of the Philadelphia Eagles. She would probably like that better anyway.

veronica

Anyway, congratulations to Travis and Maya. I hope the two of them get married and turn the wedding into an E! channel special. I will be sure to tune in. But if it doesn’t work out I hope that there will be a “Catching Kelce II”. I know how difficult it can be to date in Kansas City. I understand Travis. So if there is a “Catching Kelce II” I hope they relax the age restrictions.

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#churchflow

#churchflow is a popular hashtag on Instagram that features users in their Sunday best.  This is a post about fashion not about faith.

 

left to right:

This is a selfie in my basement.  I’m wearing a J. Crew black sheath dress with Calvin Klein platform high heeled sandals and a Roberto Cavalli scarf.  I bought the dress and scarf last year.  I believe I bought the shoes in 2014.  The dress was around $50.   Shoes were around $60.  I’m unsure of how much I paid for the scarf but I think it may have been about $40.  I was working at the store where I purchased it so I got an employee discount on top of a sale price.  It was a killer deal.

The center is a close up of the items I wore in the selfie on the left.

The right is a dress I bought in Spring of 2016 from New York and Company.  It is a part of the Eva Mendes collection.