Shannon in Kansas City YT: Shannon's Bible Study IG:@showmeshannon

“Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man…” is written by game show host and comedian Steve Harvey. This book was released in 2009. I think it’s responsible for why a lot of people are not interested in dating. I won’t say it’s worthless but I don’t think it holds much value. The book coaches women on how to decode and sift through the mind games of men. This is similar to most popular dating and relationship advice for women.

For example, Steve compares men to fisherman and women to prize fish for show or keepers. It’s not up to men to make their intentions known it’s up to women to figure out what the man’s intentions are. The entire premise of the advice is bad. The advice is based on the belief that men engage with women they don’t like or see a future with for sport.  The man has no obligation to makd his intentions known.  Women need to figure it out.  This idea is normalized and the behavior is validated.  It’s a gamble for women and men can’t lose.  There is no expectation of honor or self respect for men.  These predatory and deceptive  interactions set women up for failure.

“Act Like a Lady…” is immature and depends on women being desperate and men being dishonest, unable to express feeling and not capable of managing their emotions.

I love Steve Harvey as the host of “Family Feud” and he is funny as a comedian. I don’t know why anyone looks to him for relationship advice. Steve uses his relationship with his wife Marjorie as an example but I think she’s the third wife and he is at least her second husband. Why not discuss the failed relationships and marriages too?

I use to listen to Steve Harvey’s morning radio show. There was a segment called “Strawberry Letters”. I hated it. I couldn’t believe people had the nerve to write those letters. They were anonymous but they still should have been ashamed. Steve and his co hosts discussed the ridiculous letters and gave bad advice every morning. I stopped listening. Fortunately, the show was pulled from the Kansas City market after a while. Eventually the show was cancelled. Praise the Lord.

If a woman establishes a relationship after surviving the emotional mine field the end of the book offers more relationship advice that might be helpful.  The advice will be common sense to people in respectful, mature relationships.  If two people have sense, like and respect each other the issues discussed such as getting along with each other’s family shouldn’t be a big challenge. But Steve discusses ways to maintain a marriage that might inspire a dialogue between a couple which is a good thing.

I give this book a thumbs down. The advice may work for some but I wouldn’t want to be in a relationship like the ones Steve describes.  The mind games, lack of honesty and immaturity doesn’t seem worth the trouble even if the man decides he wants to marry the woman after putting her heart through an emotional obstacle course.