Shannon in Kansas City YT: Shannon's Bible Study IG:@showmeshannon

The term “modern women” is frequently used on social media. Modern women are the focus of complaints and vitriol from The Manosphere. The Manosphere claims that modern women are arrogant, promiscuous and masculine. They say that they can’t get along with modern women and these women make poor partners and they are too independent.

Common examples social media gives of modern womanhood are rappers and sex workers. Most women are not rappers or sex workers. Most women don’t have an Only Fans website. The fact that these are the representation of modern womanhood speak volumes of what people seem to think of women. It’s safe to assume that men have not taken a vow of abstainence until marriage. Men that claim to value traditional morals don’t seem to mind taking advantage of loose morals when the mood strikes.

I don’t think a man is wrong for preferring a woman with modest morals and clean image but it’s not realistic to act as if the City Girls and women on Only Fans are typical. There are far more women without an Only Fans account. There are more women with regular jobs as opposed to a rap career making music about their exploits with men. Traditional men should choose those women.

It’s clear that women like the City Girls and sex workers are the modern women The Manosphere pays attention to. That’s who they actually value even if the interests are only prurient. Women that are more reserved are simply not seen and not valued by these men that claim women are only interested in social media and twerking. Women that are more conservative aren’t a part of the conversation.

The Manosphere shames women for being educated, having a career, being too heavy, being an unmarried mother or not being married by a certain age. Modern women are degraded for being anything other than the ideal, submissive housewife. Podcasts and You Tube channels geared towards men lament this modern age and they claim that they long for more traditional women but they are uninterested in being traditional men. Tradition and patriarchy state that men are supposed to lead. These men are seeking leadership from women instead of setting a standard.

I’m Gen X and my maternal grandmother had a third grade education and was a sharecropper. She and my grandfather had nine children and lived in poverty. My father’s mother finished high school and worked in an auto manufacturing plant. She also did hair. Those were the educational and career opportunities that were available to them.

I am educated beyond high school and I don’t break my back or suffer heat stroke to earn a living. I have much more freedom of movement and choice. I don’t think I should feel ashamed for taking advantages or opportunities or making decisions that benefit me as an individual.

Modern women can act on in their own best interests and that’s where modern men with podcasts and You Tube channels have failed to adapt. Disgruntled and disillusioned men that consistently complain about women on social media have failed to adapt to modern circumstances. These men don’t have a strong sense of self. If they did they would set standards for themselves individually and seek out partners that were compatible to them as opposed to lurking on the internet and criticizing women that they think are beneath them.

For much of human history, across cultures women have been controlled by men as if they were property. Women were a family bargaining chip or the spoils of war. Over the last few decades women have been able to act as their own advocates and agents. The egos of the modern men of the Manosphere resents that a woman can do without a husband socially and economically in these modern times. If she chooses to marry it’s because she sees the benefit of the union. Her marriage benefits her personally; not her family or slave master.

A good partner is something to be grateful for and I’m sure most women appreciate that. I don’t think that has ever changed. What has changed is what men offer to women in those relationships. Compatibility is key. Two people need to like, admire and respect each other as individuals and not just for what they other person can do for them or their image.

Babies are still born, children are looked after, homes are cared for, Sunday and holiday dinners continue to be prepared. That’s mostly the domain of women even in these modern times. None of that has changed. Modern women aren’t that different from women in the past we just don’t have the pressure to marry or have children. I think that’s a blessing for everyone involved.

Modern men need to evaluate themselves and adapt to modern times and modern women. Explore why it’s so hard to relate to women as human beings unless you’re judging them based on their acts of service or sexual attraction.

Find a compatible mate. There are all kinds of women around. Men have a right to their choices but hostility, dishonesty and hypocrisy is unnecessary. Pursue your dreams but find something else to do besides degrading modern women. Modern women have a lot to be proud of and we shouldn’t allow ourselves to be defined by the modern men of The Manosphere.