One of the many problems that I’ve found with dating in this age is that people forget to try and make a simple connection. I believe that romance can not happen until there is a basis of friendship between two people. That’s not to say that I believe that a man and a woman should be friends only first. I believe that romance and friendship can blossom simultaneously.
People ask way too many personal questions at the very beginning of a courtship. It is a complete invasion of privacy. They always ask the same few questions.
- How long was your longest relationship?
- When was the last time you were in a relationship?
- What went wrong in that relationship?
- What kind of guys do you like?
- What are you looking for?
- Do you have any kids?
- Do you want kids?
Geez of Pete. The interrogation makes me feel like I’m on a job interview or in a pageant or something. I really don’t even know how to answer the questions. Well actually, I know the answer to the question but I don’t want to entrust you with the answer because I don’t know you. You are still a stranger.
I am a friendly person but I do not open up and reveal a lot about myself to people easily. These guys may genuinely be trying to get to know me but I feel like they are prying. When did dating become such an invasion of personal space.
I really wish people would just try and find something to talk about. Find common ground. If people are going to hit you with a barrage of questions I wish the questions were more like this:
- Have you read any good books lately?
- Have you seen any good movies lately?
- Do you watch any TV shows?
- Do you know any good places to go out in this town?
- Do you like sports? What’s your favorite team?
- Where did you grow up?
- Do you have brothers and sisters?
I wish people would focus more on simply getting to know a person as opposed to all the relationship nonsense. Just because you have a first or second date with a person it does not mean that you and that person will end up in any sort of relationship. People need to learn to enjoy a person and understand that no one owes anyone anything. If you can’t simply enjoy a person’s conversation or company at the beginning of a relationship you may be paddling upstream.